The other day a friend posted on face book asking if she should be embarrassed by the fact that she wanted to go to the new Shriek movie by herself...sans a child or grandchild. Everyone agreed...she should go. And I volunteered to accompany her. After all...why be embarrassed by yourself when you can take a friend along.
As I've gotten older,wiser or maybe it's indifference...but going places by myself is not an issue. Sometimes I even prefer it. Now don't get me wrong, I enjoy the company of others, but if there is something I want to do, to see, to experience and no one wants to go along...I'll just go alone. Not an issue. But there was a time when isolation, being a lone was more than just comfortable for me. It was a way of life.
The demons, those green monsters of life had taken over my existence and it was easier to numb everything, to hide from life rather than experience it. I had buried myself into a dark hole that I had no desire to come out of.
Sobriety had me climbing out of that dark hole step by step, learning to face the monsters without running from them. At first I still did not feel comfortable in social settings or even crowded spaces. Still found comfort alone and away from those that I felt did not understand me.
Once I learned to love myself again, to actually find out who I was it became easier to mix into society again. To the point that sometimes I just don't give a damn what others think. Not sure if that's a great idea...but it has it's good points!
Anyway, the other day a friend and I ventured into the local movie theater to watch the new Shriek movie..we even went to the matinee....sans any children as decoys. We were the only brave adults that didn't need the security of a child to see a animated movie. We ordered our coffee, Perrier and yes popcorn. Yep...popcorn with coffee. It doesn't matter...you have to have popcorn in a movie.
We got comfortable, settled in our seats and laughed our way through a great movie. Best part...rolly-polly Puss in Boots. Well....actually he had a hard time fitting into those boots with weight gain. But he made me laugh...a lot.
It was a great afternoon, with a friend. No embarrassment necessary. It's just another valuable life message that this program has taught me. Being comfortable with myself and most important, friendship. :)
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